Let’s talk about this new Sahara social media app…

Hey guys, so Friday night I got the motivation to write about something that really bugs me.

Now, if you’re a teenager you’ll probably know about this new Sahara app. For anyone that doesn’t know, “Sahara (Sarahah) is a Social Communication Application to Send or Receive Honest Anonymous Feedback.” It’s basically a copy of Ask.FM. For anyone that doesn’t know what that it is pretty much the same sort of thing. Except for with Ask.FM there was a feed where anyone could see what was written to you and people could choose whether they were anonymous or not when writing a message, you could also choose whether you wanted to reply to these comments as well. With Ask.FM the concept was more to ask questions whereas with this new app it is used to “send or receive honest anonymous feedback.”

A lot of people I know have got this new app and a lot of them are screenshotting what they get sent and putting it up on their Snapchat or Instagram, which is all good and well. It doesn’t bother me. Some of the things being sent to these people are really lovely and it’s all anonymous so you have to try to figure out who sent what, which is kind of fun. I think it’d be a really good idea if that’s how it was used all the time.

However, last night one of my friends screenshotted some hate that they got sent and replied to it on their story.

So here’s what you’re probably thinking – Why are you writing about this? No one cares.

I care.

So my friend got sent a long anonymous message claiming that she is an “overweight fat gay little sh*t who deserves everything that’s happening to her…” That everyone “hates” her, that she’s “annoying and ugly”, that she should go and kill herself so that she does “everyone a favour”. Along with some other personal things that I’m not going to write. It was horrid and NO ONE should have to read that. It really boiled my blood.

Here was my reply when my friend put it up on her Snapchat story. “Don’t listen to whoever that horrible person is. I’m actually shocked, this is horrible. You are loved by so many people, you are hilarious and happy! You make everyone happy even when you’re not feeling 100%. You’re not even fat. Who cares about size anyway? I mean if your happy then do you xxx”

It really bugged me that someone would actually write what they did so I continued to write. It’s the best way for me to get out what I want to say.

I know how she felt and that really angered me, no one deserves to feel rubbish because 7F620462-1898-4222-96A4-7F5B19A28607of some anonymous bully. It bugs me a lot.

“I hate bullies so much. We’re living in a time where E V E R Y O N E should be accepted no matter who / what they are / what they look like. I don’t understand how anyone can hate as much as some people. it makes no sense to me. your hating on someone who personally makes me very happy, like just her/his whole mentality and positivity puts a smile on my face. After having a rubbish day at school I’d go to volunteering and see how positive she was and it WOULDN’T MATTER what had happened at school that day. It just gets me so mad. They’ve done nothing wrong and never hurt anyone. It goes for everyone though, to be honest, no one should be bullied and it really boils my blood. No one should be made to feel worthless or useless or unwanted, it’s just WRONG. I don’t understand how people can’t see that when they say these horrible things. Bullying needs to stop. How many lives do we need to lose before we realise that?!”

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“Send me whatever you want. I will never agree to bullying, NEVER. in my mind, it will never be right. I’ve been bullied, I’ve lost people because of bullying. it makes me so mad. if you’re someone who thinks it’s right or just a joke, delete me.”

When Ask.FM first came out, everyone I knew had this app, so I got it too, thinking that it would be a bit of fun. Sometimes it was, I’d get funny messages from friends and have to guess who it was from, which was all good and well. But when there’s something positive there always seems to be something negative right behind it.

I got sent hate, I was sent horrible things by people in my year and a few people who didn’t even know me personally, it was just for their amusement. Speaking out about it a few years later a few of my so-called “friends” said that they had sent some of the horrible messages. That ruined me. I thought I had a good group of people behind me, supporting me through whatever came my way. I never thought that they would be the ones to cause the upset. The best part of their honesty? They said it was just a joke and had hoped that it hadn’t affected me much, although they already knew that it had affected me a lot.

The amount of school I missed due to being sent hate was unreal, I didn’t want to leave the house let alone go to school and sit with people or even see people who had been sending me hate. Who would want to do that?

I got told to go kill myself a lot, that was one of the most popular things said to me. The other most common comment was that people were calling me fat. I’d been told to go get hit by vehicles – the comment related to two accidents I had in the past. I’d been sent the most horrible things, you name it and it was probably in my feed. As Ask.FM had a profile for each person where people could see what was sent to them, everyone could see what people had been saying to me and because of this, some people fed off it and sent me more hate.

My point of this post? Don’t say things to people who you wouldn’t want to be sent to you.

Typically the people who sent me hate and to the person that sent my friend hate, they’re all cowards. Keyboard warriors if you like. (A keyboard warrior is a person who makes abusive or aggressive posts on the Internet, typically one who conceals their true identity). They don’t have the guts to say something to someone’s face and that is actually quite sad, in fact, I feel sorry for them. They have to feed their ego off of making people feel like rubbish without using their true identity. Kind of sad if you ask me.

Okay, so to sum this post up. Be kind, treat people how you want to be treated. Don’t send people abuse online, don’t be a keyboard warrior. There is no need for bullies in this world and quite frankly if you are sending hate over a phone or a laptop, you’re one of the worst kinds of bullies, a cyber bully.

Think about it this way, before you press send. Would you want your little brother or little sister to read that to themselves and then feel useless or rubbish about themselves? I’m hoping your answer is no, in which case, don’t send hate to someone online.

You are all wonderful and amazing human beings who don’t deserve to be sent hate or feel rubbish about themselves because of someone who feels that about themselves. Why do you deserve to feel the raft of someone else’s pain? The truth is you don’t!

So that’s it for this blog post. Hope you enjoyed reading, share this post if you agree (maybe, up to you :)). Have a good week, be kind and don’t spread hate. Behave towards others how you would want your younger siblings to be treated. Much love – Ally xx

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What does the word “Retard” actually mean? Do you actually know?

Hey guys! I’m back, its been a while since I last posted (a while meaning nearly two months – Oops…). I’ve been a little busy with exams (etc.) but I’m finally freeeee!!! I’m working on a project at the moment as well as trying to blog but I’m excited to tell you guys what the project is – it should be live in around a month or two, I’m so happy with how it is going at the moment. There are so many good things lined up for the next couple of months for me and I’m honestly so happy and excited, but of course there are a few nerves. I’m sure I will talk about it all soon.

But for now and the next few times that I post I want to get blog posts out of my drafts and onto my blog, there are so many unfinished blogs in my drafts its unreal but I couldn’t be happier to share them with you guys. This is my space and I am so excited to share all my ideas with you guys.

Okay, here goes, this idea came to me after an incident at school – in fact it’s happened quite a few times since I have left. I know I should start to get over what happened at school but for me everything big that happened there has effected me somehow and therefore I am going to write about it until something different happens or until I feel better about what happened (better isn’t the right word but I’m hoping you understand what I mean).

So I don’t know if anyone has ever experienced this (I know most have but maybe some have been fortunate not to), but for some odd reason some people seem to use the word retarded where it doesn’t make sense and it really seems to bug me – I don’t really know why – I don’t know if it’s because I wouldn’t do it but I’m not 100% sure why it does bother me.

“That’s so retarded.” – “Your so retarded.” – “You retard.”

There’s this boy that I used to talk to and he said it once, since then we haven’t spoken, I may seem uptight because of this but then again he did say it about my brother.

If you know me personally, you will know that my brother is my world and anything that bothers him bothers me as well. You don’t even need to know me personally to know that my brother means a lot to me – it doesn’t take me long to start talking about my brother with someone new.

He is so special to me – it’s really strange because I see some of my friends with their siblings and all they do is fight or argue, or they hate each other, which doesn’t really make sense to me. I’m not really sure why, it just doesn’t make sense.

Back to why this word annoys me out of context. I have had a lot of things said to me about my brother, “Your brother is so weird and retarded” – in what way does that sentence sound okay coming out of someone’s mouth? I don’t know about you but I find that really rude and quite frankly its quite offensive.

My brother is not a retard, he is no different from you. – Oh except he is, he is so much nicer, he is kind and thoughtful and wouldn’t do anything to hurt another person. He certainly would not say that about someone else.

The definition of the word retard: “Delay or hold back in terms of progress or development.”

That is all it means, it isn’t a group of people. You are lucky that you don’t have a disability – you are lucky that you don’t have things holding you back. Although I guess you’re not because I wouldn’t change my brother for anything, he is so special and kind and just so wonderful but he certainly isn’t retarded. Just because someone has a disability does not mean that they are retarded.

The word is unnecessary. I know some may use it as a joke but honestly – it puts me off even speaking to someone who I have heard use that word. That may seem weird or silly but why would I want someone like that around my brother, I wouldn’t.

So yes, if it isn’t already clear and I haven’t said it yet, I don’t like the word, it’s a horrible word that people use when they don’t understand and don’t want to understand someone who is disabled – or maybe their just saying it to their mate.

So next time your about to use that word – if you even do use this word – think about it before you speak, is it nice? Is it true? Is the person going to benefit from you saying it?

I just don’t really understand why people use that word and think its okay – it doesn’t make sense to me.

Okay, so I guess that’s it until my next blog post. I don’t know when that’ll be, I need to work out when I’m going to post and what I’m going to post. But until next time, have a good week, keep smiling, and think about things before you say them – if it’s not helpful or kind then is there really any point in you saying it? If it doesn’t benefit others what’s the point of saying it? – Stay strong and stay positive. Much love – Alison xx