Hey guys! So this week I’m posting on a Saturday instead. Yesterday was finally the last day of school for the holidays and I’m so excited! I’ve had such a decent last week of school, it’s not been 100%, but it hasn’t been too bad. This week I want to talk about a teacher who helped me a lot recently, I couldn’t be more grateful for him.
Okay, so on Thursday last week I just had enough. I started my day by listening to Christmas songs because I was organising music for a young persons Christmas party, so I had to make sure that the 3 hours of Christmas music had no rude songs in it, as when that happened a few years ago it was a nightmare. What better way to start the day, I was in such a good mood. I thought it was going to be a good day.
Now here is what has been happening, for the past two (I want to say two, not really sure if it is more) months, I have been getting a group of boys say little comments here and there. I want to say that the reason this has all been happening was because my friend said something to them that she was in the right to say, they were somewhere they shouldn’t have been so she was 100% right to tell them they shouldn’t be there. I was right next to her, so I guess that’s the reason that this started but I’m not sure.
It’s not like this is the first time I have had trouble from them, in fact, around this time last year I was having food thrown at me, being called horrible names and having people pushed into me on purpose by the exact same boys. I wrote a post about it in July to recap what happened, which you can check out here: https://myinsanewxnderlandblog.wordpress.com/2016/07/21/its-finally-time-to-talk-about-the-grief-i-got-in-september/
It took me ages to find because I couldn’t remember what I called it but when I finally read it, I realised that it’s the same boys that I was talking about and that kind of really annoyed me, I was reassured that it wouldn’t happen, of course I knew that it probably would, but I was just looking on the positive side hoping that it wouldn’t.
So on my way walking to form, I saw them in a big group, there’s no way I could have gone a different way so I didn’t need to walk past them, I definitely had to go that way and even if I was to take a different route, eventually I would still walk past them (I’m not quite sure if that makes sense or not…)
Anyways, as I was walking towards them to go where I needed to go they started to stare at me and nudge each other, this made me feel really anxious. I saw that one of them started to back his mate up in my direction so I tried to move myself out of their way so I didn’t walk into them. But as I done this they moved faster and he pushed his friend into me, it nearly made me drop my phone… I just looked at them and tried to keep walking but one of them said, “Are you really going to take that Alison?”, its like he was challenging me to say something or doing something back, to retaliate. I just replied with, “Shut up and leave me alone.” They said something back but I didn’t hear it because I already put my headphones back in so it was muffled.
Walking to form I realised that I had enough, I just really wanted to go home but I knew I couldn’t so I stayed the entire day and tried to not let it get to me.
Some people reading this may be thinking, “It’s not a big thing, why are you writing about this? It’s not a big deal.”, and yes if this was just a one-off I would have left it. But for the past two months they have been waiting outside the building that I go to quite a lot during a school day. They wait outside, I don’t know what for but when I walk past they stare, say something or laugh and I don’t know why. It’s really intimidating and it’s not nice to have to put up with every single day.
When they were in this building that I’m talking about, they were speaking to a teacher, I was with my friend and we had to walk past them. I just kept my head down and walked past them ignoring them but when we sat down, she asked me if they were laughing at me, because I had ignored them I didn’t notice but this still really bothered me.
So that’s what happened, it made me feel anxious and I got quite upset by it, I’m not going to lie. I didn’t want to go to school.
Here’s what happened… My dad emailed the teacher that I go to when I have a problem, he sorts out anything bad that is happening and generally makes my day ten times better. His attitude towards bullying and all the students in the school is so lovely, he cares so much about everyone and it’s just so amazing to have a teacher like that in the school!
Less than two hours later of my dad emailing this teacher, telling him what was going on, I got asked to go to his office for a chat. We spoke about what had been happening and how long it had gone on for. I told him that if I wasn’t as stressed as I am with A Levels then it wouldn’t have bothered me as much, he understood this. Which meant a lot to me, I know that everyone is stressed but a lot of people know how to deal with the stress whereas I don’t… I do, it just doesn’t work… Make sense?
When sat in his office he asked me what I wanted to do, I decided that I wanted to do the same thing as last time and sit in the office with them to talk. It helps, I know that may seem crazy but it really does help. Getting to ask them why they did what they did really does help me and I wish I could have had the chance to do that a very long time ago but I didn’t tell anyone.
That’s my main point about this blog post, it takes one great teacher to help make the bullying stop. All you have to do is tell them, I know that sounds daunting and like it probably wont help but trust me it does, if you find a teacher that is passionate about helping people then I really do think that the bullying could stop.
Being in the same room with those boys was quite scary, I’m being honest, even though they are younger than be it really is quite scary, but I got my answers and that’s the main thing. It meant ever so much to me. It made me feel happier, more confident, like I didn’t have to keep my head down anymore. It made me feel so much better and on Thursday I was able to walk around with my head held high.
I am so grateful for what that teacher done for me, for him to make it possible for me to talk to them in a controlled environment. It means ever so much. There aren’t very many teachers like him, not many that I have met have cared enough to make things like this possible, so to be able to do this means a lot. I know he wont see this but I still want to say thank you, thank you for making my walks round school easier, for making it easier for me to walk around with my head held high, for supporting me in general, because it honestly does mean a lot. There aren’t a lot of teachers like him, he truly is awesome.
I also want to say thank you to the friends that supported me through this, it means a lot, you know who you are. Also a big thank you to my amazing dad as ever for just helping me and supporting me like usual. I love you.
If you are being bullied, please tell someone, I know you may not want to but it really could make a difference. Don’t suffer in silence, tell someone!
Okay, so here it is. It’s almost a week until Christmas, I hope you all have a great one! Thank you for all the support and there will be a new blog post sometime next week! Keep positive, stay strong and keep smiling. Much love – Alison xx