Hey guys, so this week I am going to be writing about the myths and truths of counselling. But before I do, I just want to say a massive thank you for all the support that I got from last weeks blog post. I got so many messages and comments saying how proud people were of me and it made me so happy. Being told that I am brave for getting on the horse in the first place, and then being told that I am brave for even trying to conquer my fear, let alone succeed at doing it. Even after all that, I got told that I deserved all the kind words that I got. Honestly, all the support that I got made my week. You will never truly know how much the support means to me, just know that it means a lot and I will be forever grateful.
If you didn’t read last weeks blog post, be free to check it out here and let me know what you think in the comments of that post.
This weeks post is probably going to be me opening up to the internet again. But oh well! I have written about going to counselling before, so if you want to check out my post about that, that would be cool too. Here goes…
I know that quite a few people feel differently about counselling. I certainly know that I felt different when I got told that it would be good if I went to counselling. “It’ll be good for you.” “It’ll help you.”
In 2012, I was involved with a lot of different volunteering groups, in fact, I still am. But I used to go to a certain one straight after school, but because one day I turned up an hour late and I was upset. I was spoken to by someone who I trusted, he spoke to my dad aswell. He said that maybe I would benefit if I went to counselling. The reason I was late and was upset was because of bullying (I will probably write about this more in a different post soon but I wont go into too much detail now).
The definition of counselling… “The provision of professional assistance and guidance in resolving personal or psychological problems.”
“Counselling.” – That was kind of a scary word. Well it was for me, a 13-year-old girl. I didn’t want to go. I read about it in books, watched TV shows and films with this sort of thing in it. It was a typical girl gets bullied ends up going to counselling scenario. “Typical”, it’s a funny word that, the thing that I had read about and watched was turning into a reality.
I didn’t want to go, I had this idea in my head that people only go to counselling if there is something wrong with them, which isn’t the case, at all! My dad said that I had to try it, that I would have to go for a month and if I didn’t like it then it could stop. 4 years on and I’m still in counselling. Not because there is anything wrong with me but because the lady that I go to helps me out and gives me advice with bullying. When I first started going I was nervous and didn’t really want to be there. 2 years into counselling I found it difficult going, I didn’t mind but I found it difficult to talk about what was going on in my life (bullying). My thoughts now, 4 years later, I love to go to counselling, it’s the one day a week when I can talk as much as I want and get everything off my chest. It has defiantly helped a lot.
Okay, so there is a little bit of information about what I thought about counselling then and now. Now for the real reason I’m writing this post.
The Myths of Counselling VS The Truth…
I spent a few hours last week searching for a few myths from the internet about counselling, knowing me, this is probably the kind of thing I was thinking before I even went to counselling. Here we go…
“Only mad people need counselling.” – If you are reading this and you go to counselling, please don’t take it the wrong way. (1) It’s not always true and (2) it’s a myth that I found on the internet. I’m not going to lie when I got told that I would be going to counselling I thought that there was something wrong with me. Of course, I was wrong, counselling services are put in place to support someone.
The good old question of “how can a stranger help?” – Going to counselling means that you can vent your problems to someone, when I go to counselling it really helps because I can talk for an hour about everything and the weight that I am carrying on my shoulders is then lifted. The counsellor can give you advice and support with whatever it is that you may be going through and therefore they can help get you through a rough patch.
“Counsellors just sit there and say nothing.” – This isn’t true, I thought it would be but it’s not. At first they ask you to vent your problems, so I suppose at the beginning they just sit there but they are listening and then after they can give you the support and advice that you need.
“Counselling takes forever!” – This isn’t true either, it takes as long as you need it to be. The service helps support you and will give you advice. So I guess when you’re ready, you will know you’re ready and maybe it will be the end of counselling. The service is there for you as long as you need it to be.
“Everyone will know you’re seeing a counsellor.” – I thought this at the beginning too, but it’s not true. Unless you tell people, I didn’t at first, I told absolutely no one, apart from my best friend but over the years I have become more open about going to counselling. I opened up about it on my blog once before. But my point is, that going to counselling is 100% confidential and so no one will know unless you tell them.
“Counselling will change who you are as a person.” – I don’t think this is true. People change all the time. With the support that I have been given from friends, family and my counsellor I have become a stronger and more confident person. But I don’t believe it changes you. I don’t know, this one is complicated I suppose. Leave your opinion on this one in the comments below. I would really love to hear what you think.
I found a lot of myths on the internet about counselling but only decided to write about a few of them. With myths like that on the internet, how is someone supposed to think that going to counselling is a good thing.
I just wanted to say if you are reading this and you go to counselling or you have been told that it probably is best if you start going to counselling, its nothing to worry about. It just means that you are strong, you’re strong for going and getting the advice. I was against going to counselling, I didn’t want to share my problems with a stranger, problems that shouldn’t have happened in the first place, I didn’t want to sit in a room and talk about everything. But counselling has defiantly helped me, it has gave me the support I needed and it has gave me a confidence boost. If you have been told that maybe you should go to counselling, I recommend it, it has helped me so much and it makes you realise how much better things do get eventually.
Okay, so that’s it from me. I’ve posted on a Monday instead of a Thursday because I’m posting another blog post on Saturday that means a lot to me (Hint, hint, birthday post, hint.) 2 blog posts in one week, whoop-whoop! Anyways before I go I just wanted to say that you are stronger than you think! Accepting help from people makes you a strong and brave human being. Right that’s it… Stay strong, have hope and don’t settle for any less than you deserve! Next post on Saturday! Much love – Alison xx