When the past comes back…

Recently I’ve been seeing a lot of people that used to bully me, I’m not talking about the ones that have been horrible over the years, I’m on about the ones that started everything in year 7.

I was on the bus and someone who I thought I’d never see again sat opposite me, I had a rush of nerves. The last time I saw him he chucked gum in my hair and made me the joke of the day. I’m not going to lie, I was a bit surprised that I saw him after 5 years, I even had to stare to see if it was really him. All the memories rushed back and I couldn’t help but think about the trouble he must of been going through when he was upsetting me the way he was, I mean, you got to be going through a pretty hard time to treat someone like that. I wanted to ask if he remembered me and if he did, why he did what he did, but I didn’t particularly want to talk to him anyway, the past is in the past and although I will most likely never forget what happened, I don’t want it brought up. That probably defeats the object of writing it on my blog but oh well.
People always used to me that I’ll move on and forget about it and although I’ll never forget about it I will definitely move on and better myself as much as I can.

There was a careers fair in school last week, and one of the people running one of the stools was one of the boys that used to be in a big group down the school alley that used to pick on me, they’d trip me up so I’d fall in the mud puddle and then say horrible things to me. They would throw stones at me, food at me, anything they could find. They would block my way so I couldn’t get out the alley to go home. They would come up to me and put their arm around my shoulder and take the micky.
The boy I saw at the careers fair, was the same boy that used to be the main one in the group to upset me. Me being who I am, saw him, smiled and walked straight past him with my head held high. Yes he may of been able to upset me 5/6 years ago but now, now he can’t say anything that will upset me, I’m stronger and honestly, I don’t care what he has to say, it doesn’t matter to me, what he has to say is probably not interesting anyway. When I was sat down he was staring at me, and I could see it, he remembered who I was, maybe not my name, but he remembered. I felt sorry for him, life must be pretty bad if you have to take the time to upset other people.

I’ve always had people say to me, “Oh, don’t worry, they’ll leave you alone soon and you’ll forget all about it.” But the truth is, they didn’t leave me alone because I didn’t tell anyone what was going on and I didn’t stand up for myself so it got worse and it went on for a few years and I will probably never forget what happened. It’s what you take from the situation that will help you in later life though, I somehow managed to take positivity from the bullying and turned out to be the person I am, some people may turn it into negativity and turn into a bully themselves but if you really think about it, you know how it feels to be treated like that so why do it to others?

Sorry this weeks blog post is short, next blog post will be up next Thursday (as usual)!! Have a good week! – Alison xx