So this is me opening up once again. I don’t think that many people know, but I thought I should share that I go to counselling. Mainly because when someone gets told they should go to counselling the instant thought is that something is wrong with them when there isn’t at all.
On the 11th of June it will be 3 years since I started going to counselling. I started in 2012. That was mainly because of one of my youth workers. He saw that I was upset and started talking to me about it. The day I saw him I was late to go and see him and for me that is strange, or it use to be anyway, I was always early to this, but because I was a hour late and seemed upset he knew something was wrong. I had a bad day at school, I remember it like it was yesterday and the more I wish I could forget it the more I can’t. Some boy humiliated me in front of a big group and I couldn’t seem to ignore it. At the time I didn’t have many friends so not that many people stuck up for me. My youth worker knew I didn’t tell anyone about the incident and got in contact with the school to sort it out. He also spoke to my dad about counselling. That worried me.
When I got asked whether I wanted to go to counselling I didn’t know what to say. I thought there was something wrong with me. I was kind of worried, I thought if anyone found out that I’d be humiliated, I don’t know why I thought that but I did. Counselling isn’t a bad thing, it is a way for me to talk about what is going on. I was worried that I wouldn’t feel comfortable telling a complete stranger what I’m going through and at first I was really quiet, I didn’t really say anything to her, she asked the questions and I answered quietly. But now, she sees me walk in and before we’ve even got into the little room we’re already having a conversation. It’s great! I actually look forward to going to counselling now, my first and second time I was really nervous but after that I felt great.
Sometimes I will go to counselling with a big weight on my shoulders but the moment I leave I feel so much better! It’s like I’ve bottled it all up until I see her and then it all comes out and I feel so much better. If you go to counselling or if a parent or career has said something to you about counselling, don’t feel ashamed about it! It will make you feel so much better, at first it will be awkward but after 3 times of going you will feel so much more confident with going. I know I do.
I just thought I’d write about this because without counselling I wouldn’t’ be where I am today, I’d probably still be shy and not as confident as I am now.
Thank you for the support Much love –Alison xx